Funny Snowman And Winter Weather Jokes

Two snowmen were standing silently in a suburban front yard on a freezing January morning after a massive snowstorm had blanketed the neighborhood. The sun was just beginning to rise over the trees, casting a cold blue light across the lawn. Suddenly, one snowman turned his coal eyes toward the other, sniffed the icy air, and said in a panicked voice, "Do you smell that strong, sweet aroma in the breeze?" The second snowman looked at him through his pebble smile, let out a cold sigh, and replied, "Of course I smell it, you idiot—it's my nose, and a family of hungry squirrels is currently having breakfast on my face."

A family built an elaborate, six-foot snowman in their driveway, complete with a top hat, a woolen scarf, and two coal buttons. Two days later, an unseasonably warm tropical air mass pushed through the region, raising the temperature to sixty degrees by noon. As the snowman began to sag sideways and turn into a slushy puddle on the asphalt, a neighbor walking his dog stopped by and said, "Looks like your winter friend is having a tough afternoon!" The melting snowman's top hat slid down over his carrot nose as he muttered, "Tough afternoon? I'm not melting, pal—I'm just converting from solid-state holiday cheer to a low-profile liquid asset."

A homeowner woke up at five in the morning to find two feet of heavy, wet snow burying his entire driveway and sidewalk. He pulled his heavy gasoline snowblower out of the shed, primed the engine, and pulled the starter cord ten times, but the machine only emitted a sputtering cough and a puff of black smoke. His neighbor walked out onto his own clear driveway, holding a mug of steaming coffee and operating a high-powered, brand-new electric snowblower with one hand. The struggling homeowner wiped snow off his forehead and yelled, "What's the secret to getting that thing to work so easily?" The neighbor took a sip of coffee and shouted back, "The secret is buying it in July when your driveway isn't an arctic tundra!"